Last Saturday night Regan (my 15yo) came to me with some concerns.

A bit of background first..

She has a friend at school "Steven" who she often facetimes and texts with.

Regan has come to me before asking me how to respond to Steven when he has shared with her that he is gay and his parents don't accept it and were making him go to an "anti gay" counselor.

I was so torn as how to respond. I've taught my children to be who they are, and accept others as who they are.

I ended up responding that she should not get in the middle of his family issues, tell him that even if he goes to the "anti gay" counselor it doesn't mean he has to believe him, and more importantly I stressed that Regan assure him that she was there as a friend to talk to and one who would not judge him.

Back to last Saturday night..

Regan comes to me saying she is concerned about Steven.

Somehow Steven found a MAN on FaceBook (a week earlier) who was going to "adopt" him.

Adopt..

Huh?

Yes.. adopt..

This man told Steven he had bought a house in Astoria for them to live in, and that he was coming to their school that Monday to pick Steven up (with a policeman) and take him in for a 48hr protective custody, so that Steven could decide if the wanted to be adopted by this man.

My first reaction was of disbelief.. WHO would believe this shit?

And my second reaction was Regan, seriously.. YOU believe this?

Well she was unsure of it all, unsure enough to come to me.

THANK GOD

One other friend was messaging Regan at the same time expressing his concern as well. He also had told his mother.

After looking at this guys profile on FB (he is 27yo), I could see it was created earlier this year, had lots of regular friends pictures and then your standard shirtless in the bathroom pictures. But most appeared to be in albums created the same day.

BUT he did have a picture of his grade school class picture and it was the same person. But anyone can make a fake FB or use someone elses information.

This man also said he had to remove Steven as a FB friend for awhile as he was not to have contact with Steven until he picked him up at school.

After a bit of conversation I asked Regan if I could call her other friends mom.

So I called her. She was nice, she said she had a law background and nothing she was being told by her son was making sense either, we discussed if the police should be called or what.

She was concerned I could tell, but seemed to want to brush the whole thing off for me or someone else to deal with.

Regan messaged Steven telling him she told me what was going on as she was concerned for his safety. Steven got mad and messaged back saying that the man was upset for some reason. Then Steven ended all communications with Regan.

We had a long discussion, was Steven exaggerating? What exactly has he said and to who? Stuff like that.

In the end we decided first thing Monday morning Regan would go talk to the Principal and then get back with me.

Monday morning comes.. no call from Regan..

I was a bit nervous but I know her well enough she DID indeed go talk to the Principal but I did contemplate calling the school just to check.

Early Monday afternoon I got a call from her Principal.

She first wanted to praise Regan for coming forward and bringing this to her attention.

Obviously she could not tell me details but assured me that there was a safety plan in place for Steven, that the police were involved and that it appeared there was a very good chance this man was indeed intending to meet up with Steven.

I mentioned the "anti gay" counselor thing and the Principals response was kind of odd, she said that there were some religions that had that sort of thing. Steven's parents are very religious. I am guessing perhaps this might be part of it as I know when he came out to his parents it has been rough on him at home.

I talked with Regan after school. The whole little group of friends were coming up to Regan asking "Did you hear what happened with Steven?" As he had been pulled out of class and not seen for the rest of the day.

Regan kept quiet about her involvement but apparently a LOT of kids had known about this man, how he was going to "adopt" Steven, how he was going to come to the school with a policeman, the house he bought in Astoria ... all of it.

Some had concerns and doubts

"But he has a facebook"

"It says he graduated from law school"

"They had chatted with him personally" 

- conclusion:

he must be who he says and it was ok for him to come take Steven for this 48hr protective custody thing.

Out of about 10 kids in this group that knew what was going on, one.. ONLY ONE, approached Regan asking if she was the one who talked to the Principal. Regan said yes but only for Steven's safety.

He thanked her and said he had been too scared to speak up.

Some kids had said that they would follow Steven when he went with this man (he was to be at the school at 10:30am) and wait outside the house in case there was any trouble.

Other kids felt Steven would be okay and able to call for help from his cell, if the guy turned out to be creepy.

OK, these are all 15 year olds. They go to a baccalaureate school. A school that is VERY hard to get into.

Locally it's called "the smart kids school" because there is a LOT of homework and the standards are much higher for students than at regular schools.

You just assume they would know how hinky this all was.

This whole incident was a HUGE, I mean HUGE wake up call for me.

We parents just assume that with all the information given to our children, at home, at school, and on TV, about sexual predators and the dangers of meeting people on the internet, IT CAN STILL HAPPEN.

Regan is a smart girl. I know her friends are too, they have common sense.

I kind of wonder if it was just the fear of speaking up, expressing their concerns to Steven or to one another, or that they just thought they could handle it and "save" Steven if things with this man went wrong.

Or, like Regan and I have discussed, we think some of them actually believed this man was who he said and knew what he was talking about legally and that it was OK, because he had a FaceBook that showed his education in the legal field and some of them had chatted with him online asking him questions to make sure he was real.

Like the Principal told me, it scared her to death that things like this happen and that kids (teens) actually get sucked into believing these creeps.

And thank God someone stepped in and told a parent, and the Principal.

I'm still concerned as when Regan first came to me I could tell her gut instinct was telling her something wasn't right and she felt unsure, and that she wanted assurance that it really wasn't ok, the the things this man was telling Steven.

Steven hasn't been at school all last week. 

I'm going to check in with the Principal tomorrow to make sure he is okay..