Last Saturday night Regan (my 15yo) came to me with some concerns.

A bit of background first..

She has a friend at school "Steven" who she often facetimes and texts with.

Regan has come to me before asking me how to respond to Steven when he has shared with her that he is gay and his parents don't accept it and were making him go to an "anti gay" counselor.

I was so torn as how to respond. I've taught my children to be who they are, and accept others as who they are.

I ended up responding that she should not get in the middle of his family issues, tell him that even if he goes to the "anti gay" counselor it doesn't mean he has to believe him, and more importantly I stressed that Regan assure him that she was there as a friend to talk to and one who would not judge him.

Back to last Saturday night..

Regan comes to me saying she is concerned about Steven.

Somehow Steven found a MAN on FaceBook (a week earlier) who was going to "adopt" him.

Adopt..

Huh?

Yes.. adopt..

This man told Steven he had bought a house in Astoria for them to live in, and that he was coming to their school that Monday to pick Steven up (with a policeman) and take him in for a 48hr protective custody, so that Steven could decide if the wanted to be adopted by this man.

My first reaction was of disbelief.. WHO would believe this shit?

And my second reaction was Regan, seriously.. YOU believe this?

Well she was unsure of it all, unsure enough to come to me.

THANK GOD

One other friend was messaging Regan at the same time expressing his concern as well. He also had told his mother.

After looking at this guys profile on FB (he is 27yo), I could see it was created earlier this year, had lots of regular friends pictures and then your standard shirtless in the bathroom pictures. But most appeared to be in albums created the same day.

BUT he did have a picture of his grade school class picture and it was the same person. But anyone can make a fake FB or use someone elses information.

This man also said he had to remove Steven as a FB friend for awhile as he was not to have contact with Steven until he picked him up at school.

After a bit of conversation I asked Regan if I could call her other friends mom.

So I called her. She was nice, she said she had a law background and nothing she was being told by her son was making sense either, we discussed if the police should be called or what.

She was concerned I could tell, but seemed to want to brush the whole thing off for me or someone else to deal with.

Regan messaged Steven telling him she told me what was going on as she was concerned for his safety. Steven got mad and messaged back saying that the man was upset for some reason. Then Steven ended all communications with Regan.

We had a long discussion, was Steven exaggerating? What exactly has he said and to who? Stuff like that.

In the end we decided first thing Monday morning Regan would go talk to the Principal and then get back with me.

Monday morning comes.. no call from Regan..

I was a bit nervous but I know her well enough she DID indeed go talk to the Principal but I did contemplate calling the school just to check.

Early Monday afternoon I got a call from her Principal.

She first wanted to praise Regan for coming forward and bringing this to her attention.

Obviously she could not tell me details but assured me that there was a safety plan in place for Steven, that the police were involved and that it appeared there was a very good chance this man was indeed intending to meet up with Steven.

I mentioned the "anti gay" counselor thing and the Principals response was kind of odd, she said that there were some religions that had that sort of thing. Steven's parents are very religious. I am guessing perhaps this might be part of it as I know when he came out to his parents it has been rough on him at home.

I talked with Regan after school. The whole little group of friends were coming up to Regan asking "Did you hear what happened with Steven?" As he had been pulled out of class and not seen for the rest of the day.

Regan kept quiet about her involvement but apparently a LOT of kids had known about this man, how he was going to "adopt" Steven, how he was going to come to the school with a policeman, the house he bought in Astoria ... all of it.

Some had concerns and doubts

"But he has a facebook"

"It says he graduated from law school"

"They had chatted with him personally" 

- conclusion:

he must be who he says and it was ok for him to come take Steven for this 48hr protective custody thing.

Out of about 10 kids in this group that knew what was going on, one.. ONLY ONE, approached Regan asking if she was the one who talked to the Principal. Regan said yes but only for Steven's safety.

He thanked her and said he had been too scared to speak up.

Some kids had said that they would follow Steven when he went with this man (he was to be at the school at 10:30am) and wait outside the house in case there was any trouble.

Other kids felt Steven would be okay and able to call for help from his cell, if the guy turned out to be creepy.

OK, these are all 15 year olds. They go to a baccalaureate school. A school that is VERY hard to get into.

Locally it's called "the smart kids school" because there is a LOT of homework and the standards are much higher for students than at regular schools.

You just assume they would know how hinky this all was.

This whole incident was a HUGE, I mean HUGE wake up call for me.

We parents just assume that with all the information given to our children, at home, at school, and on TV, about sexual predators and the dangers of meeting people on the internet, IT CAN STILL HAPPEN.

Regan is a smart girl. I know her friends are too, they have common sense.

I kind of wonder if it was just the fear of speaking up, expressing their concerns to Steven or to one another, or that they just thought they could handle it and "save" Steven if things with this man went wrong.

Or, like Regan and I have discussed, we think some of them actually believed this man was who he said and knew what he was talking about legally and that it was OK, because he had a FaceBook that showed his education in the legal field and some of them had chatted with him online asking him questions to make sure he was real.

Like the Principal told me, it scared her to death that things like this happen and that kids (teens) actually get sucked into believing these creeps.

And thank God someone stepped in and told a parent, and the Principal.

I'm still concerned as when Regan first came to me I could tell her gut instinct was telling her something wasn't right and she felt unsure, and that she wanted assurance that it really wasn't ok, the the things this man was telling Steven.

Steven hasn't been at school all last week. 

I'm going to check in with the Principal tomorrow to make sure he is okay..

Pay It forward

Isn't it odd how things work out...

Last Thursday (my B-Day 9/10/2009) John was looking at the "wanted" section of Craigslist around 10:00 p.m. or so.

To jump back in time a bit.. I live in apartments, and as people move A LOT, it has become an unwritten rule, that if you don't want to take a usable item to say, the Goodwill, and you do not feel it's worth throwing away, you set it in a clean place that is near the dumpster.

About a year ago, he had found the item pictured (a brand new never used Exogen 4000 Bone Stimulator for healing broken bones)

He originally picked it up for the case, then opened it, and for whatever reason, although I had no use for it, I could not throw it away.

Yeah, it's been sitting in my house for over a year.. I'm just one of those who could not see the point in throwing it away... Eventually I forgot about it...

Jumping back to last Thursday... John sees a "wanted" ad on Craigslist (picture included) of this VERY ITEM! The poster said he was willing to pay and gave a phone number.

Now how freaky is that!

I told John to call but there was no way in HELL that we would accept any monies for this, as we found it! I just didn't feel right about making a free buck off of someones discarded "trash".

He called, and we found out it was a young college student on the track team at Seattle Pacific University that had broken his foot and could not afford this machine that the doctor recommended he get. So hence the reason he posted on Craigslist.

He was going to be traveling to Portland in about a week and wanted to meet up, I just said, we will send it FedEx, and NO CHARGE, we just ask that he pay the favor forward.

As he was a college student, I told John that us paying for the FedEx postage and sending the item to him would be better than any birthday present/gift I could ever possibly get.

We packaged up the item, I put a note in that said something to the likes "I hope that you can use this and that your foot heals well, all we ask is that you "Pay It Forward" and do something someday for someone else in need."

We received the following e-mail a few days ago after he had received his item...

-----Original Message-----
From: Daniel Friesen <friesd@spu.edu>
To: johnxxx@xxx.com
Sent: Thu, Sep 17, 2009 10:52 pm
Subject: Bone Stimulator

Hey John and Melly,

I received the bone stimulator and it has worked like a charm. I cannot begin to thank you so much for your generosity and kindness. You have truly been a blessing to me and my health. I would also like you to know that after I am done with this machine, I will be passing it onto my school for use by any athlete. In blessing me you have blessed many. Thank you again so much for everything, and I hope you are rewarded with a blessed life.

Thanks again

Daniel Friesen

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

This post is not to "brag" about what we did...

But rather think about karma, helping others, and yes....

"Paying It Forward"

=)

Exploring A Meth House

Driving down the road, you may glance up into the trees and see something that catches your eye, the colorful graffiti, a boarded up window, an abandoned house...

But most people I imagine, just look away...

go along their way...

without another thought...

The pictures below most people may not find interesting.. why??

Because it's just an old house that has been "trashed".."junk".."an eyesore"... who cares about that?

I do...

I care..

I wonder about who once lived here..

Why did they leave, where did they go?

Who has come since, and why?

As at least for me, the one glance you get while driving by.. does not tell the whole story...

And the closer you get, the more you look...

The more you see..

And I am still left with a lot of unanswered questions and a hell of a lot of mixed feelings inside....

First view...

As you walk around to the side you can see the carport. A burn barrel.

A trashcan. And lots of other various things.

Looking into the burn barrel you see...

Service Award from Jr. High School dated 1958

Card - Happy Holidays! All we want for Christmas is our 4 front teeth

Photos - family... friends... a scout holding an American Flag...

Recognition award from work

A keychain most likely a child made in school out of beads

Somebody's memories put in the burn barrel....

What was the most troubling is that all the "memory" items were

left in the barrel, while all the actual trash was scattered about..

Hard to make out, but yes, this is a diaper in the trash can...

It had not been there long....

It saddened me to think of someone bringing their young

baby to this place. Sad that the mother and/or father, may

not even think of it as odd at all, to bring a child here.

Written on the eaves of the carport... no explanation needed...

Note the makeshift ladder that is placed below the only unboarded window on the house..

Unopened cans of food in the cupboards. It was evident

from looking in the kitchen, no food had been cooked

here in a while.

The Living Room.

It was as if you could faintly imagine a family, sitting around the fire, laughing, sharing memories, each other's company. You imagine it neat and tidy, pictures on

the walls, ...welcoming..

What screamed louder in my imagination was someone cold needing a place to stay, various people sprawled about in different stages of alertness..

But again, people sitting around, maybe laughing, crying, angry, but none the less, sharing each other's company and memories...

Each bedroom had a tent in it (minus poles)..

This was the most haunting...

Stairs to the basement....

Previous owners "tools" scattered about.. Tipped over chairs,

a mattress in the corner (not shown in picture), empty containers

of food...

And the maroon Lazy-Boy recliner in perfect condition.. it even had the

cloth arm covers still on it...

A mixture of trash from past owner of the home and people that had been

there since...

Outside again...

Someone made this windmill by hand...

In the back you can see a wall decoration for a child's room

now discarded and peeking out from the blackberry bushes.

Walking down behind the house is a pleasant trail.. quiet.. calm...

Whatever animal this was it ate berries... And also had (or does)

live nearby...

We came across this laying right in the middle of the trail... I was told people get the butts out of ashtrays, put them in the bag and then use the remaining tobacco to roll their own cigarettes.

This is the start of a trail that leads deeper into the woods..

Tents, sleeping bags, blankets, old winter clothes scattered about...

The first camp (and the best kept) camp we came to at the top of the

trail.

Inside the tent was makeup, old boomboxes, flashlights, clothes...

Someone took a lot of time in this area, there was a "handrail/rope" crafted

and tied to the tree to make easier access for decending the steps they had

carved out of the dirt down the hill..

A hangar on a branch next to the first camp......

Makes you wonder...

A golf course is across the street from this area..

This is a golf bag, stripped and a grill attached for cooking food...

Another camp.

Not as neat and tidy, but you could see the table with

the lanterns, tents (again with no poles), makeshift chairs...

There were at least 7 or 8 "camp areas" ...

Some of the items below found in or around them...

Yes, this is a hairpiece.....

Candles, tealight candles.... all that was missing was the spoon..

Scattered about were a LOT of "eyeglasses cases"...

This one got opened and dropped VERY quickly....

There was SO much more.. but it was time to go...

This house will be torn down soon..

Goodbye old house....

Goodbye old memories..

Goodbye shelter from the rain.

Goodbye a place to get high..

Goodbye

Just One Request...

Annika, my 17yr old got a note from her younger sister Regan (almost 12yrs old) that she shared with me.....

Worth the read.. (typed just as she had written it...)

Annika.

If you go to the navy,

I have a request.

A hug. Just one.

before you leave, if you do (to the Navy)

I'll never hug anyone else, to keep your hug-ness still on me.

(weird, huh?)

is that why you never hug me?

did someone who was special hug you & never hugged you again?

I'm sorry.

Maybe everytime I hug you some of the persons hugg-ness rubs off on me.

Maybe if you hug me one last time before you leave, if you do,

maybe the persons hugness will rub off back on to you.

And maybe even some of my hugness will, too.

Love

~your sister

Signs of The Times

We have a tradition in our house to leave the baby tooth that fell out, in a glass by the open window.

The Tooth Fairy flys in and takes the tooth and leaves money.

My 11 year old knows I am the tooth fairy but I asked her to still go ahead and leave her tooth.

This is what I saw in the window after she went to bed.

The picture would not get bigger in this blog but click on it and it will enlarge....

I didn't know quite how to feel honestly.....

911 call .... makes me wonder

Well, ppl that know me know I listen to the police scanner.. hot summer nights are especially interesting times... and I have very odd sleeping habits so I am often up at 3am, wow.. the stuff you hear...

Anyway.. last night I heard one and it made me ponder...

The dispatcher has to relay to the officer exactly what the caller is telling them.

Last night I hear:

Dispatcher: caller says she woke up and felt something was on her chest. Says it was a demon. caller says there is a verse in the Bible about it. caller also says her closet doors were closed and now open due to a magnetic field around them. caller says that the demons are going to get her and would like assistance.

Well, it is sad as this is obviously a mental health issue and unfortunatley I did not hear the outcome of the call, but it got me to thinking.

I had my 3rd child via emergency c-section, the whole situation was a life/death situation, I even signed all the forms for blood transfusions, thank God I did not have to go through that...

But after they did the c-section they assigned a pre-med doctor or something to sit by my bed all night to watch me.

I don't remember much other than someone in a chair and.... feeling like I had something in me, it was uncomfortable, I told the person in the chair I had an entity in me... and it was Howard Stern.. and I wanted him out...

How the hell I came up with this I will never know, I sure as hell hope it was the pain medicine talking, I laughed about it the next day when I confirmed that I really did say that to the man that sat by me all night... but even at that..listening to that call last night, really made me think of the human mind and when some... go over the edge..

So although I did laugh last night at the 911 call I heard on the scanner, I also wondered, how fragile in some ways is the mind.. as I once pretty much was "out there" too, when Howard Stern was an entity in my body..

I'm glad he didn't stick around =)

Oh! Looks like someone moved the "Crack Creme"!

OK, so a few months ago, John and I are in the local pharmacy... waiting in line and I remembered my daughter had a rash on her elbow, she had told me the name of the product her friend used so we were off to search...

Then we came across "Crack Creme"...

Needless to say I started laughing hysterically and of course had to get pictures with the camera phone!

It was a bit high up so I moved it down to my level so I could get a good shot.. Then with that, I left to get my items and asked John to ask the employee for help finding what we needed for my daughter.

John comes over after a few minutes, holding in laughter best he could...

I guess when he had asked the lady for help, she headed straight on over to the "crack creme" area.. hey at least we were in the right spot! And she grabs the "crack creme" and says, "Oh look, someone moved the Crack Creme!" and replaces it to it's original location. All with a total straight face.

Ok, so as I write this, or even so much as think about it I get a big grin on my face... =)

Hey, it's all how you look at things in life eh? And I just look for the fun! =)